Maybe I am... a little more than just grateful

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One of my favorite things to read, at present, is Pioneer Woman. She's funny, she's nuts, and her life is like a ancient fortress, primed and tended by generations gone before. It's immovable. On the days when the fast pace of action and adventure and constant change is too hard to swallow, I dream of the constancy of a rancher's life and escape into her world. And besides all of that, I can read each entry in a few minutes and then hurry on to what's pressing.

Right now I'm sitting in my pajamas at 9:30 in a dark quiet house listening to the coffee pot percolate wondering if I'll ever have a day like this again. I haven't laughed or cried or remenisced or made memories like I have this week in all of my life. One of the richest blessings that God has lavished on us has to be, no holds barred, the friendship that Christians have because of Christ. Relationships with people of like faith nurture us in ways that nothing else can. I am rich, even when we're broke, because of my family and my friends. People all around me lift me up and encourage me, cheering me on in the race, and when I can't physically hear them, they are praying for me. How can it be that God in all of the mystery and wonder that is His would place in my life so many people that really truly love me for who I am and with my countless flaws? I am more than blessed, I'm in awe.

We're moving to California in four days. I feel relaxed, drinking my coffee, chatting on the telephone, moving slowly through my day, but my mind and body tell me otherwise. In the midst of conversation there are gaps because I can't bring the word to mind that I want. I love words. Words are like sweet candy in my world and I can't find them or use them well because of the mental capacity overload that I am denying by my actions but is evidenced by the constant churning in my stomach. I am laughing more than crying, which is good, but that will come in time. Life is good, but I am swimming in the overwhelmingness of my present. It will all settle again in the weeks to come and I won't be so scattered, but for now this is what I am. SO PRAY FOR ME, my sweet and wonderful friends, and know that I am praying for you as you call or stop by or come to mind.

Comments

  1. sMay 28, 2007 at 2:05 PM

    I will.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ejmummMay 28, 2007 at 3:28 PM

    Dearest Beloved,

    I will ever so miss you and your wonderful family. You know who I am, but maybe not right off the bat. I am a women much like yourself, however not as bold or courageous. I love being around you even though it may not be often. You have made an incredible impression in my life and believe me when I say I will never ever forget you or your family. I wish you all the very best in your journey and remember you and your family are in my prayers daily. May God give you the strength and courage to get by one day at a time and remember I am only a phone call away.
    Blessings,
    ejmumm

    ReplyDelete
  3. chewpMay 30, 2007 at 9:07 PM

    Hi Becca, it's been a while. I didn't realize you all were moving to California. I hope everything goes well and your transition is swift. Tell Lonnie I said hello. God Bless.....btw, I think you're going to write an awesome book someday!!!......Chewp

    ReplyDelete
  4. KatyCatJune 4, 2007 at 5:12 PM

    I moved away from California and now you are going?? Well even if we do not ever see eachother again, know that you are always in my heart, my memories and my prayers. Love, Katy

    ReplyDelete

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