Made to Crave

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I have been bemoaning my insurgent weight gain for months; it came at me in such a hurry after my big loss.  I know I have complete control of this thing, but I feel out of control.

So I have sort of been rolling around in my mind the necessity of cutting out sugar. It's silly, really.  I love sugar. I mean, I look forward to it after every meal and between each chore of my daily life. When I get up, when I go to bed, when it's cloudy or sunny. When I feel an emotion, any emotion... I sort of live for it. It's moderately become a problem. But I have considered giving it up.

The thing is, I am pretty sure I can't do it. I have tried with minimal success. And why should I? Unless God is asking it of me.

Maybe you think I am nuts. The reality is that when God speaks He confirms His voice in other ways, right? So last weekend my sweet mother-in-law brought me the book Made to Crave. 

I started reading it at the doctor's office. It's basically about replacing your food cravings  with God through prayer and Bible study and desperation for Him.  At the end of each chapter there are questions to ask yourself.

Questions like, "How would you like to have an accountability partner to help you stop eating the wrong foods?"

No. I wouldn't like it.

"Why?"

Because I don't think it will work.

"Why not?"

Because I don't think I can and I don't want to stop. I like eating more than you know. More than I know.

I almost cried on the way homefrom the doctor's office.  It's ridiculous.  Would God really ask this of me? While I am pregnant even? Does it matter to Him, honestly? Am I really that addicted?

I know it's God, too. He wants me to make this change. I have been wrestling with the question of whether it has become a sin or not. Apparently it has.

Writing this even scares me. I don't know if I can change. I am going to ask God to help me. I may cry. I can't imagine never eating sugar again. I love it. So much.

Pray for Me.
Lvb

Comments

  1. Stewart FamilyAugust 9, 2012 at 4:35 PM

    Hhhmm...Well I am in the same boat! I too love the sugar! Lately what I have been doing is keeping busy when I want something to eat....or don't have the temptations in the house! Have the kids help you be accountable. Mine do! Make yourself a fresh fruit smoothy with no added sugar! It is tough. Pray for me too:)

    ReplyDelete

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