Scattered
Here's a blast from the past...
Princess Leila on the front porch of our 2nd Street Mansion. She is still royalty around here. We're trying desperately to break her reign, but she's so dang sweet! She rules us all.
Tre and Micah in their Zelda costumes at the kitchen table- which they have almost outgrown already. Sorry Mom, the sunshine and saltwater works like miraclegrow on my kids! They got these on a Monday and I peeled them off of them the following Monday insisting that they be washed.
The last rainy day that the kids were in Nebraska, I was feeling especially nostalgic and decided to let them play in the mud. This is the end of our driveway where they bathed and splashed and screamed for a long, long time. Hahaha. They were so excited.
Mr. Fantastic; discovering that he is a real boy with belches and toxic emmissions from the nether-regions. He is still breakdancing and doing life-threatening flips onto his head, no matter how much we discourage them. Crazy kid.
Ever had a skunk? I think we have one living under our shed in the backyard. I don't know how it's getting in and out, but Scooter got sprayed about a week ago. Gag. It was terrible. When he came in, he was whining and wiping his face with his paw trying to get the stink out of his eyes and nose. My eyes were burning, and it wasn't normal skunk smell, it smelled like burnt rubber. Oh it was just awful. Well ever since that night, he's been sitting next to the shed and sniffing around the base of it when he goes outside. I don't really know what to do. Can't I sprinkle something around the yard to ward them off? It's completely fenced in by a tall privacy fence, but there's sand so I'm sure it's digging under the fence.
We are busy, busy, busy. I don't know how our lives fill up. We are still tending to the neighbors dogs twice a day, which occupies a lot more of my schedule than you might think. They are sweet dogs, but they're big and not trained to submit to my commands, so they aren't very manageable. Plus they live in a giant sand box and I walk in and out of a cloud of filth. I feel like PigPen, the Peanuts character, everytime I walk out of there. Poor things. I wish I could be more of a pet sitter, but I just can't sell out to neighborhood animals along with tending to my own bunch. It's more than I have to give.
Something interesting about California, besides the markets on the weekend, every Sunday people set up huge Bar-B-Que tents in parking lots for fund raisers. And they're cheap! Half a rack of ribs for $7.50, a whole chicken, same price. So cool. And everyone eats Tri-Tip steaks and roast. I bought a roast the other day that was pre-seasoned and grilled it real low and it was delicious. It's just interesting that different parts of the country have these normal elements of life that are completely foreign to other regions.
Sundays are always so bittersweet; they always have been. My stomach doesn't knot up when I get up in the mornings, but there is still a battle raging inside me to fight for what I believe the church is suppose to be. Then the pacifist in me says, "don't rock the boat." But maybe that's it; maybe that's my purpose here. To rock the boat. I always look for the good in things, but experience forces me to see everything else and that for what it is. Unfortunately, this one's kind on me because Dale is occupied on Sunday mornings with other responsibilities. He'll let me know what needs to be done and when, but then I'll have to handle it. *heavy sigh* I'd rather just sit in the back row and enjoy what I perceive as the pros and stuff the cons. I've been praying for direction, after making my own observations of the church and now I'm stirring.
I don't know why my life has to be about war, but it is and I have not fully accepted that yet. And you know what I always say about that... no wonder I always have so much unrest. I have not accepted it and so I have no freedom.
Jesus came to rock. And yet, when everyone around him was in chaos and panic, he was completely controlled and at peace. Because He accepted it. He knew the mission of seeking and saving would also involve kingdom warfare. Maybe I feel unprepared for the battle and so I'm quaking in my boots. I know what's not right, but I can't fully articulate what is right because my knowledge is so flimsy. Driving home from mega-church every Sunday I would rant about all the things wrong with the teaching and philosophies filtering out of the pulpit, and one day Dale said, "You know what looks so wrong about this, but what is right supposed to look like?" I was floored. I never tested well, still don't. So when it comes to accessing knowledge, I am a floundering idiot and had no answer. I can process and study and find answers, which I did, and now I know what I'm looking for, but the ducks are still scattered.
So, it's Sunday, and I have a new game plan *getting a jump start on the week*, which I will not be sharing at this time because my faith in the plan is still weak, but pray for me to get my legs under me. I am praying for you, my friends and my precious family, when God drops you into my thoughts. I miss you... and I know it could be awhile before I see a familiar face in my end of the world, but I'll wait patiently. Anticipation makes the reality of you at my front door so much sweeter.
Princess Leila on the front porch of our 2nd Street Mansion. She is still royalty around here. We're trying desperately to break her reign, but she's so dang sweet! She rules us all.
Tre and Micah in their Zelda costumes at the kitchen table- which they have almost outgrown already. Sorry Mom, the sunshine and saltwater works like miraclegrow on my kids! They got these on a Monday and I peeled them off of them the following Monday insisting that they be washed.
The last rainy day that the kids were in Nebraska, I was feeling especially nostalgic and decided to let them play in the mud. This is the end of our driveway where they bathed and splashed and screamed for a long, long time. Hahaha. They were so excited.
Mr. Fantastic; discovering that he is a real boy with belches and toxic emmissions from the nether-regions. He is still breakdancing and doing life-threatening flips onto his head, no matter how much we discourage them. Crazy kid.Ever had a skunk? I think we have one living under our shed in the backyard. I don't know how it's getting in and out, but Scooter got sprayed about a week ago. Gag. It was terrible. When he came in, he was whining and wiping his face with his paw trying to get the stink out of his eyes and nose. My eyes were burning, and it wasn't normal skunk smell, it smelled like burnt rubber. Oh it was just awful. Well ever since that night, he's been sitting next to the shed and sniffing around the base of it when he goes outside. I don't really know what to do. Can't I sprinkle something around the yard to ward them off? It's completely fenced in by a tall privacy fence, but there's sand so I'm sure it's digging under the fence.
We are busy, busy, busy. I don't know how our lives fill up. We are still tending to the neighbors dogs twice a day, which occupies a lot more of my schedule than you might think. They are sweet dogs, but they're big and not trained to submit to my commands, so they aren't very manageable. Plus they live in a giant sand box and I walk in and out of a cloud of filth. I feel like PigPen, the Peanuts character, everytime I walk out of there. Poor things. I wish I could be more of a pet sitter, but I just can't sell out to neighborhood animals along with tending to my own bunch. It's more than I have to give.
Something interesting about California, besides the markets on the weekend, every Sunday people set up huge Bar-B-Que tents in parking lots for fund raisers. And they're cheap! Half a rack of ribs for $7.50, a whole chicken, same price. So cool. And everyone eats Tri-Tip steaks and roast. I bought a roast the other day that was pre-seasoned and grilled it real low and it was delicious. It's just interesting that different parts of the country have these normal elements of life that are completely foreign to other regions.
Sundays are always so bittersweet; they always have been. My stomach doesn't knot up when I get up in the mornings, but there is still a battle raging inside me to fight for what I believe the church is suppose to be. Then the pacifist in me says, "don't rock the boat." But maybe that's it; maybe that's my purpose here. To rock the boat. I always look for the good in things, but experience forces me to see everything else and that for what it is. Unfortunately, this one's kind on me because Dale is occupied on Sunday mornings with other responsibilities. He'll let me know what needs to be done and when, but then I'll have to handle it. *heavy sigh* I'd rather just sit in the back row and enjoy what I perceive as the pros and stuff the cons. I've been praying for direction, after making my own observations of the church and now I'm stirring.
I don't know why my life has to be about war, but it is and I have not fully accepted that yet. And you know what I always say about that... no wonder I always have so much unrest. I have not accepted it and so I have no freedom.
Jesus came to rock. And yet, when everyone around him was in chaos and panic, he was completely controlled and at peace. Because He accepted it. He knew the mission of seeking and saving would also involve kingdom warfare. Maybe I feel unprepared for the battle and so I'm quaking in my boots. I know what's not right, but I can't fully articulate what is right because my knowledge is so flimsy. Driving home from mega-church every Sunday I would rant about all the things wrong with the teaching and philosophies filtering out of the pulpit, and one day Dale said, "You know what looks so wrong about this, but what is right supposed to look like?" I was floored. I never tested well, still don't. So when it comes to accessing knowledge, I am a floundering idiot and had no answer. I can process and study and find answers, which I did, and now I know what I'm looking for, but the ducks are still scattered.
So, it's Sunday, and I have a new game plan *getting a jump start on the week*, which I will not be sharing at this time because my faith in the plan is still weak, but pray for me to get my legs under me. I am praying for you, my friends and my precious family, when God drops you into my thoughts. I miss you... and I know it could be awhile before I see a familiar face in my end of the world, but I'll wait patiently. Anticipation makes the reality of you at my front door so much sweeter.
Becca,
ReplyDeleteTopher and I have been asking ourselves the same questions concerning church. We have actually left the AG. We have been reading alot in Timothy about how paul told Timothy how the church should be organized and the standards for leadership. After reading that we had no other choice but to compare our fellowship against the word, and frankly...it didn't come close to measuring up. I heard Douglas Wilson say that the core of the church is the families that attend. If the families are unhealthy and a mess, the church will be also. I think some of the change that needs to be made is in the area of giving biblical teaching parents, giving them a biblical standard for their children, and families...not the world's standard.
your right, these are tough questions and we are searching too. You're not alone.
Karla