Tattoos
We had and have all these milestone birthdays happening this year.
I haven't been too shaken by any of them, except for Kennedy turning 18. This is chartered territory. Her mama is staring the reality of her "leaving the nest" in the eye. It's bittersweet, scary and exciting. She was never going to turn 5, remember? I thought she'd be a pre-schooler forever. And now, here she is in college, working a job, thinking about buying a car on her own; it's crazy. I just didn't realize she'd ever really leave us.
Kennedy will be 18.
Micah will be 16.
Tre turned 13.
Leila turned 10.
Clinton turned 1.
Awhile back she announced that she would be getting a tattoo on her 18th birthday. I think I surprised her when I said, "Let's get one together!" I don't have any tattoos. I never really wanted one, not seriously. Not until recently.
At first we were going to get the same one. She wanted a compass. An anchor. The ocean. I couldn't commit to any of these colossal markings. I am neither a traveler, nor a sailor, nor lover of the deep. It wouldn't represent me well.
I started thinking about all the children that would be flying the coop and realized I'd need a lot of different tattoos if I tried to match each one. Maybe I would do a charm bracelet around my wrist, one tattoo for each kid. .,,hmm, What if the kid decided not to get a tattoo? How would I decide what charm would represent that kid on their 18th birthday? What if I decided halfway through that I didn't like the idea of a permanent piece of jewelry? I needed something profound. Something classic. Something I would love forever.
Arrows? Children are like arrows in the hands of a marksman, right? And arrows are so classic, and freaking awesome, but I would need to draw them down my arm. or arms. I'm not quite there. Although the moms in our neighborhood thought I was "sleeved" one Halloween after we trick or treated and I wore tattoo arms as a costume. I sort of liked it then. But I think it was more about being noticed, I was invisible and didn't have many friends. And quite frankly, I needed people. I also wanted to do mixed martial arts classes at the time. Um... I was a little lost. Which might have been part of my problem.
WAIT! I've got it!! Birds! How perfectly a little bird flying away would accomplish my mission. At the end, when my nest is empty, I'll have a flock of flying birds delicately placed on my shoulder and wrapping around my back. So there it is. Don't be shocked when you see me and I'm "all tatted up". This body ain't my home. But I have to wear it for a while and I want to see and pray for each of their lives everyday, even long after they're gone. Because I love them so crazy much. After all, I'm not sure who I'd be without them.
Fly little birds! Fly!!
lvb
I started thinking about all the children that would be flying the coop and realized I'd need a lot of different tattoos if I tried to match each one. Maybe I would do a charm bracelet around my wrist, one tattoo for each kid. .,,hmm, What if the kid decided not to get a tattoo? How would I decide what charm would represent that kid on their 18th birthday? What if I decided halfway through that I didn't like the idea of a permanent piece of jewelry? I needed something profound. Something classic. Something I would love forever.
Arrows? Children are like arrows in the hands of a marksman, right? And arrows are so classic, and freaking awesome, but I would need to draw them down my arm. or arms. I'm not quite there. Although the moms in our neighborhood thought I was "sleeved" one Halloween after we trick or treated and I wore tattoo arms as a costume. I sort of liked it then. But I think it was more about being noticed, I was invisible and didn't have many friends. And quite frankly, I needed people. I also wanted to do mixed martial arts classes at the time. Um... I was a little lost. Which might have been part of my problem.
WAIT! I've got it!! Birds! How perfectly a little bird flying away would accomplish my mission. At the end, when my nest is empty, I'll have a flock of flying birds delicately placed on my shoulder and wrapping around my back. So there it is. Don't be shocked when you see me and I'm "all tatted up". This body ain't my home. But I have to wear it for a while and I want to see and pray for each of their lives everyday, even long after they're gone. Because I love them so crazy much. After all, I'm not sure who I'd be without them.
Fly little birds! Fly!!
lvb
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