yes, they're all mine

I signed up for google plus a few months ago.
I don't really get it, call me crazy.
I add you, you add me back, we're in a circle...?
My kids have referred to it as
   "kind of like a facebook for people whose parents won't let them have facebook"

Ok.

I'm not even sure how I was prompted to fill out a profile
or really why I would need to
but I do things like that, so I did.
It asked me for a tagline.
After a few witless attempts at awesome, this one stuck.

yes, they're all mine

I say it every single time I leave the house with kids, sometimes multiple times a day.
Nine kids is a rarity. What's funny is that I usually only have a handful with me when people ask.
If the whole crew goes out on the town, people are so awe-struck by the sheer numbers of us that they just stare, unabashedly.

I don't mind. Stare. Ask questions. I love it.
Not all my kids feel the same way, but I'm the mom.
My tribe is my pride.

With that said, I thought today would be a good day to share a few tips and tricks I've learned along the way. In words of Paul, 13 ...I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet... We are a work in progress.

1. If you look like you're in control, people believe you're in control.
Even when there are multiple littles in meltdown city mode, if you look like you are managing it         well, people will see you as in control. And let's be honest, if you can keep your voice calm, your       eyes patient, handle one freak-out at a time, you are in control. If you fell yourself slipping, maybe     you should do one more lap around Target. You're less likely to lose it in public. And they have           Starbucks. Seriously, Starbucks is magic potion for mamas.
2. When you stay caught up, you stay caught up. 
Transversely, when you don't stay on top of things, it seems impossible to catch up. Life moves           quickly, like an intense current. Your hours are full. Do the little things to stay caught up, like a           quick pick up every time you get out of the vehicle, and you won't have to schedule a full day to do     a detailed clean-out next month when it's a total disaster area.
3. That old line from Karate Kid is my mantra "always look eye." 
Look your kids square in the face when you speak to them, if at all possible. They are people. They     need to be seen and heard.
4. To diffuse a meltdown, send the offender to a designated place to get his wits together. 
We have screamers in this house. Many of them. If we have ever been friends, like "come over and     hang out" friends, you know that when someone screams, I don't flinch. You aren't even sure that I     heard it. I just keep talking, because the screaming is so common here. However, when one of my       littles is having a meltdown over something unreasonable (like, he wants cottage cheese for lunch       and there's no cottage cheese in the fridge, but he keeps looking for it and falling into a puddle on       the floor every time he opens the refrigerator door and it's not there) I send him to the corner. "Go       to the corner until you're done crying, Buddy." This teaches him that it's OK to have a meltdown,       but not in Kitchen Grand Central. He cries it out and then announces, "I'm done kying!" And I             allow him to come back and join life in the kitchen. It's a simple exercise in self-control that I've         used for years. It works almost every time! (If it doesn't work, a nap will likely fix it.)
5. Ages 0-12 is about establishing rules. Ages 13-18 is about establishing a lasting relationship.
I heard this years ago, before I had a 12-year-old, but I tucked it away into the vaults of knowledge     and put it into practice as soon as Kennedy turned 12. It's not that the rules go away, but listen to         me, mamas, you will want to re-enforce every one of them with your adolescents because they will     test out your stamina on every. single. one. They KNOW your rules. They've lived with you for           over a decade. You will need to carefully choose what matters and let the rest go. Always show           love, even when you're mad. Don't isolate. Build that relationship. It matters, as much as they             figuratively spit in your face, it matters now and it matters later, for both of you. Give yourself and     your kids a lot of grace, don't suffocate them with the law while they are drudging through the           most difficult passage of life, from childhood to adulthood. You have a special place of influence,       gifted to you by GOD, don't waste it!!

You're living the dream, mamas! Just keep going. We're in it together!!
lvb