Yup.

It's the emotional swing from elation to devastation that wears me out. It's good news, it's no news, it's good news, it's no news. I wish we could just have a crystal ball so that we'd know what to do, which would eliminate faith altogether and then we'd be empty, but full of confidence. The journey... it's all about the journey. Sometimes I think about the days and wish them away to the next stage, then other times I think about the end stages and hope I don't wish away the years because I can attest to the fact that sometimes the golden years are more like the tarnished years. I know it sounds really sad and pessimistic, but I see people that spend every day of the end of their lives locked inside a strange place with no one that knows their secrets or their favorites or their middle name. I just want to cherish the days for what they are *a gift* and not wish them away. I have never gone without. I have never suffered a loss that disfigured me beyond recognition. I have yet to experience poverty, even in though we've been in that tax bracket most of our marriage. We are rich. We are rich beyond ourselves with health and life and joy and the sweet taste of fall all around us... life is good because God is good. Shame on me if I wish away another minute of my life for something better because it just doesn't get better than this.