sunshine
3/25/2020
I don't have plants because I can't remember to water them. Someone gave me one a few months ago when I hosted dinner. It was generous, but I killed off all the flowers. It's still alive, I think. We'll see how long it can hold out against my track record.
I can't remember what day it is. I struggle with this on vacation, during holidays, and now during quarantine. Everyday feels like Friday. Without weekly events to mark time, I'm lost. I have a metal flip calendar that sits on my kitchen window reminding me every morning, but it only stays in the que for as long as I am standing at the sink.
After a two week hiatus, I finally got a route. A route means I am in the car for a significant block of time by myself. I listen to podcasts, audio books, audio Bible, nothing. Sometimes I listen to nothing and let my thoughts go. I spend a lot of time praying through the thought processing, that's probably the single greatest asset of the time I'm in the car. I love it. It lets my soul breathe.
I thought I was a goner yesterday. The thick stifling suffocating air of despair was crawling up my throat, closing in as the day went on. I tried to pray. I tried to read. I tried to focus, but a rattle of anxiety drove me from the quiet to the busy, to occupy my mind, to quiet the noise. A bowl cookie dough was enough to calm the beast, but I knew it would take more than a fix to get me past it. Turns out I just needed to leave. I came back better. I have needed this every week for the past eight-ish years. I'm not sure how I forgot the necessity of this practice, oh how much MORE I need it now that we are locked in our houses.
Being locked in our house makes me feel like I'm a living member of "The Village", that movie from 2004. It's like those scary plague-masked creatures that roam at night are the physical embodiment of the coronavirus. The novel coronavirus doesn't feel much like a novelty to me.
We picked up meals from the school today, it was a great addition to our daily routine, which is all kinds of a new normal, even though it shouldn't be as regular homeschoolers. My sweet friends have encouraged me to do it, and I conceded. Boy am I glad I did. The kids absolutely loved it.
Another day in paradise. Legit. Also sunshine. Bless God.
I don't have plants because I can't remember to water them. Someone gave me one a few months ago when I hosted dinner. It was generous, but I killed off all the flowers. It's still alive, I think. We'll see how long it can hold out against my track record.
I can't remember what day it is. I struggle with this on vacation, during holidays, and now during quarantine. Everyday feels like Friday. Without weekly events to mark time, I'm lost. I have a metal flip calendar that sits on my kitchen window reminding me every morning, but it only stays in the que for as long as I am standing at the sink.
After a two week hiatus, I finally got a route. A route means I am in the car for a significant block of time by myself. I listen to podcasts, audio books, audio Bible, nothing. Sometimes I listen to nothing and let my thoughts go. I spend a lot of time praying through the thought processing, that's probably the single greatest asset of the time I'm in the car. I love it. It lets my soul breathe.
I thought I was a goner yesterday. The thick stifling suffocating air of despair was crawling up my throat, closing in as the day went on. I tried to pray. I tried to read. I tried to focus, but a rattle of anxiety drove me from the quiet to the busy, to occupy my mind, to quiet the noise. A bowl cookie dough was enough to calm the beast, but I knew it would take more than a fix to get me past it. Turns out I just needed to leave. I came back better. I have needed this every week for the past eight-ish years. I'm not sure how I forgot the necessity of this practice, oh how much MORE I need it now that we are locked in our houses.
Being locked in our house makes me feel like I'm a living member of "The Village", that movie from 2004. It's like those scary plague-masked creatures that roam at night are the physical embodiment of the coronavirus. The novel coronavirus doesn't feel much like a novelty to me.
We picked up meals from the school today, it was a great addition to our daily routine, which is all kinds of a new normal, even though it shouldn't be as regular homeschoolers. My sweet friends have encouraged me to do it, and I conceded. Boy am I glad I did. The kids absolutely loved it.
Another day in paradise. Legit. Also sunshine. Bless God.
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