the tension
Another day in quarantine paradise...
I got up early this morning, checked my email, read my Bible, stalled on the headlines...
Littles were up within thirty minutes, and I joined them for our first day back the school. Everyone is in good spirits, as the world is burning down outside these walls. Our county was looped into a "stay at home order" along with several other counties in Kansas City, starting in 51 minutes.
It doesn't feel real.
My list of to-dos included the SOP6: (standard operating procedure 6)
Prayer and Meditation
Exercise- Today it was Just Dance on YouTube with the kids
Shower
House Chores- I pulled the septic filter and sprayed it off. It was way overdue. Caked, actually. :(
Play something- Today it was Just Dance on YouTube with the kids, so...
Dinner- Chicken Sandwiches and French Fries, and Steak Fajitas for me and D
During school, the kids did an indoor scavenger hunt, which was wildly entertaining, but up didn't take much of their day. Too easy. We'll pick a different one later. They also built a volcano scene and our science experiment was the old baking-soda-and-vinegar trick. It was thrilling!! We recorded it and posted it to Facebook where they got lots of great comments.
It was cloudy and cold outside, but we went for a walk anyway. Then after dinner, I played a few rounds of Dr. Mario with the big kids while the littles played commentators on the sides.
Down in my guts there's a rumble that I can't quite identify. I cry so easily. I laugh a lot and switch modes on a dime. Dale keeps asking me if I'm ok. I feel ok until I don't. Then I feel like a mess. A big fat hot mess with no answers and no words.
Kennedy was mortified today when I said, "I can't really talk about it because it makes me too happy that I could die soon and go home." *tears
This world is not my home, and I have no loyalty to it. My home is where Jesus is, and that is the rumble. Pure, unadulterated joy at the reality of my homecoming, and the tension of my precious darlings being left here. If I don't think about it, maybe it won't squeeze me so tightly, and yet, the tears come so easily at a single thought, I have to say it out loud.
I got up early this morning, checked my email, read my Bible, stalled on the headlines...
Littles were up within thirty minutes, and I joined them for our first day back the school. Everyone is in good spirits, as the world is burning down outside these walls. Our county was looped into a "stay at home order" along with several other counties in Kansas City, starting in 51 minutes.
It doesn't feel real.
My list of to-dos included the SOP6: (standard operating procedure 6)
Prayer and Meditation
Exercise- Today it was Just Dance on YouTube with the kids
Shower
House Chores- I pulled the septic filter and sprayed it off. It was way overdue. Caked, actually. :(
Play something- Today it was Just Dance on YouTube with the kids, so...
Dinner- Chicken Sandwiches and French Fries, and Steak Fajitas for me and D
During school, the kids did an indoor scavenger hunt, which was wildly entertaining, but up didn't take much of their day. Too easy. We'll pick a different one later. They also built a volcano scene and our science experiment was the old baking-soda-and-vinegar trick. It was thrilling!! We recorded it and posted it to Facebook where they got lots of great comments.
It was cloudy and cold outside, but we went for a walk anyway. Then after dinner, I played a few rounds of Dr. Mario with the big kids while the littles played commentators on the sides.
Down in my guts there's a rumble that I can't quite identify. I cry so easily. I laugh a lot and switch modes on a dime. Dale keeps asking me if I'm ok. I feel ok until I don't. Then I feel like a mess. A big fat hot mess with no answers and no words.
Kennedy was mortified today when I said, "I can't really talk about it because it makes me too happy that I could die soon and go home." *tears
This world is not my home, and I have no loyalty to it. My home is where Jesus is, and that is the rumble. Pure, unadulterated joy at the reality of my homecoming, and the tension of my precious darlings being left here. If I don't think about it, maybe it won't squeeze me so tightly, and yet, the tears come so easily at a single thought, I have to say it out loud.
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