Engaged

Remember that day when your dreamy romance became a forever promise...
The day you were given a ring and a hope of things to come from the man of your dreams?

I walked around in a flurry of excitement for weeks.
I flashed my ring as often as possible. I wanted to tell EVERYONE!!
"Look at me! I'm getting married!! He chose ME! He wants me forever!! I'm getting married!!"

That's what I feel like right now.
Only it's not that I'm getting married. (I'm already married, silly!)

I'm engaged with our Father.
He's calling me to something new and giving me a promise of things to come.

I want to shout it from the rooftops, but it's a matter of keeping my pearls tucked away and not tossed out to be trampled. I have this terrible habit of speaking too soon... That's why I'm here with you. You share my dreams and keep my secrets, my sweet friends.

God is speaking to me so clearly lately. He's asking me to do hard things. He's drawing me out from behind the curtain and into a sort of "center stage" life. No more shying away from things that make me nervous. No more waiting for something better. It's time to step up and contribute.

Titus gives these very specific instructions to women.
I've spent the last 10ish years wondering
Am I a younger woman, busy at home with husband and children?
Am I an older woman, responsible to share wisdom with the younger?
Do I seek wisdom or do I pour it out?

No longer. I know who I am. It's time to pour out.
Years I've been self-consumed, hoping someone would pick me up and set me straight.
Those days are gone. The Lord is speaking. He's moving.

I'm engaged
In the work of God.
The work He set out JUST for me.
The work he intended, just for me.
Only I can do it. There's no comparison here. It's unnecessary to be fearful.
There will always be someone smarter. Someone better. Someone prettier and skinnier and younger.
But God, Designer of the Universe, intricately designed me, just like this,
For such a time as this.

lvb