oh what a tangled web we weave

I didn't want to believe it. We loved Ravi so much. He was one of the first intellectuals in Christian thought that I cared to read. His passion for truth was compelling. He was gentle and compassionate and understanding. It didn't seem possible that he could be leading a secret life, a life void of character and virtue. But as the old adage goes, be sure your sins will find you out.

I'm not surprised that he got caught in sin, we are all vulnerable in our weaknesses. What surprised me was that he could convey the love of Jesus so succinctly and not feel the sting of separation from Him. Like a dog returns to its vomit. Like a man who looks in the mirror and immediately forgets what he looks like. Out of the same cistern, freshwater and saltwater. 

This situation is a painful reminder that no one is above hypnotic lullaby of sin. We have to talk about it. We have to confess our sins to one another. We absolutely must go to Jesus and repent every single day. Without that kind of consistency, we are vulnerable to all sorts of traps and snares. The lure of sin is sweet. It feels good. It takes the edge off. It makes promises that we know it can't keep, but we want to believe anyway. It draws us when we are tired, hungry, lonely or busy. It's crouching at our door, waiting for an opening. But in the end, it leads to death.

I have made this prayer my own, knowing that without Jesus, there is nothing good in me.

O Lord God,

    Thou has commanded me to believe in Jesus,

    and I would flee to no other fountain,

    build on no other foundation,

    receive from no other fullness,

    rest in no other relief.

His water and blood were not severed

    in their flow at the cross,

    may they never be separated in my creed and experiences;

May I be equally convinced of the guilt

    and pollution of sin,

  feel my need of a Prince and Saviour,

  implore of Him repentance as well as forgiveness,

  love holiness, and be pure in heart,

  have the mind of Jesus, and tread in His steps.

Let me not be at my own disposal,

  but rejoice that I am under the care of One

  who is too wise to err,

    too kind to injure

    too tender to crush.

May I scandalize none by my temper and conduct, 

    but recommend and endear Christ to all around, 

    bestow good on every one as circumstances permit, 

    and decline no opportunity of usefulness. 

Grand that I may value my substance, 

    not as a medium of pride and luxury, 

    but as a means of my support and stewardship. 

Help me to guide my affections with discretion, 

    to owe no man anything, 

    to be able to give to him that needeth, 

    to feel it my duty and pleasure to be merciful and forgiving, 

    to show to the world the likeness of Jesus.

            The Valley of Vision "Jesus My Glory"